This is about how my favourite family memories are often set to music. When the TV goes off and the tunes go on, the atmosphere in the house changes. We may be entertaining guests, but more likely I'm only cooking dinner or organizing a closet and when the music is on, it means we’re hanging out around the house. I love the days spent listening to Sunday Mornings Over Easy or the Acoustic Brunch but sadly, the times they are a changing. Looming in the back of my mind is the knowledge that the whole family lazily starting the day, safe and sound under one roof, will feel different when one member of the household is AWOL (not that I don’t want her to go to school but, you know...).
Music was often playing in the background of our home movies. The kids were once willing participants in our musical rituals and I can’t help but smile when I watch videos of the kids when they were little, dancing around our tiny livingroom. The two of them could be seen holding hands, laughing and whirling in circles to the beat of The Beach Boys—spoiler alert for those with young children—those moments don’t last forever. This of course was long before they became eye-rolling, easily embarrassed teenagers who barely resurface from their iPods.
Our son will remain in our presence most evenings even though his mind is elsewhere, usually deep into group texting, but for many years now, our daughter’s voluntary appearances in our livingroom have been few and far between. That was until recently when we all spent a rare evening downloading YouTube music videos and sending them wirelessly to the stereo to fill the room with song. It was a humid 35°C night and we were gathered in the cool air inside the house, thankful the power grid on the eastern seaboard was handling the heat wave with ease. Maybe it was because her classes were done and highschool would soon be a mere memory, or because she was feeling pre-homesickness knowing she would be leaving for five weeks this summer before moving out for school, but she stayed in the same room with us for hours that night. My racing heart recognized that we were recapturing those elusive days of relaxed togetherness from their childhood, or maybe it was the chocolate-covered cashews we were passing around, but I knew I didn’t want to spoil the delicate balance that was happening. Anastasia and Christian would have to wait because I wasn’t about to pick up my book and break the spell of this enchanting evening. I would venture to the kitchen sporadically to fill my wine glass with a chilled chardonnay then mosey on back to my spot on the couch—I even put off going to the bathroom as long as possible, afraid of jinxing the moment. We drifted from Kim Carnes to Evanescence, Otis Redding to The Black Keys, and my husband and I reminisced aloud about roller skating to Electric Avenue and running under the bridge to Eye of the Tiger. I wondered if hearing a familiar song would resonate with our kids when they remember back to 2012 and think about the night we debated whether a particular song warranted its 400,000,000 views.
My advice is this: Don’t let those opportunities to enjoy the company of your teenagers pass you by. Ignore the dirty dishes and books, they will still be there ready for your attention when you’re all alone. You gotta keep those lovin’ good vibrations a happening. I’m baking treats and turning up the music right now, we’ll see if the magic happens again.
